So_Beautiful_u_cant_see's Xanga

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Sat, 26 Aug 2006 17:34:02 GMT

BYE BYE.... NO MORE XANGA'S.... ONLY MYSPACE... SO IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME YOU CAN TEXT ME OR CALL ME AT 352-5878 OR GO TO MY MYSPACE WITCH IS ALREADY ON THIS...

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Sun, 13 Aug 2006 16:14:11 GMT

Lets see.... I just moved yesterday... It sucks...But yea.... I have a story... Friday I went to my bro's BMX races and Dusty P works up there and I like him and I always have since school and I had to tell him some how that I liked him because I was moving... well i wrote him a note telling him and my mom took it from me and gave it to him... well I ran to the park and she looked at me and was like damn she ran fast and then dusty tryed to see me and I was gone... Well she can and got me from the park and said he wanted to talk to me so I went up there and he was closing up so I helped him and he said it sucked that I was moving and I told him I would be up here sunday to clean...and then when he was leaveing he was like well since you will be up sunday call mykael or derek because I will be with them and maybe we all could hang out... I was like ok...

Friday, July 07, 2006

Fri, 07 Jul 2006 16:25:59 GMT

WOW... Lets see.... Summer is great I got a new razer phone... UMMM me and Brit arent friends and we will never be..... And I was lisening to HINDER-GET STONED and its right sex is way better when your mad at eachother... LOL... But yeah ummm what else nothing much.... Well leave comments or go to my myspace... KK...

Friday, June 16, 2006

Fri, 16 Jun 2006 00:07:57 GMT

Hey everyone.... Wow I needed to update so thats what I am doing.... Not that anyone comments me but yeah I am on myspace more because its like cooler... LOL... But yeah last weekend was so much fun I went to rock fest with my dad, Jason, Cory, Josh, Asley and Jessica my girls.... and corys mom.... It was so so so much fun we were like a foot away from three days grace.... I wish I got pics...

<3 Jess

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Tue, 06 Jun 2006 21:44:33 GMT

This is my eveything... I love him so much... He is so WOW!!!

<3 Jess

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Thu, 25 May 2006 20:34:20 GMT

NO MORE XANGA!!! ALL MY SPACE..... Well I might up date this thang once in a while but I us myspace more......

www.myspace.com/staywithme4ever06

Friday, May 19, 2006

Fri, 19 May 2006 23:26:35 GMT

Hey Hey Hey.... Calm down I am sry I havent updated this thing in like forever.... You know how it is..... SO MUCH SHIT TO DO ANYTHING.... But yeah Me and Brit are still BEST FRIEND.... I love that gurl.... She is there for me 24/7.... I hope it is the same for her.... You know..... But yeah ummmm 2 more days left of school... That mean party party party this summer.... YESS!!!! Cant wait.... But yeah ummmm.... Guys: Ummm I like a couple.... No one really know who I like.... but yeah thats why my site is so love like..... But yeah Plans..... For this weekend and Next week.....

Friday: Nothing because I am sick and didnt go to school... But I might go get something to eat with my dad.... we will see....

Saturday: Going shopping with Brit to get a new swimming suit.... Yeah it is going to be so cute....

Sunday: Ummm.... Well I forgot for a sec.... Let me think.... I am sry I am watching my fav movie right now so I am distracted.... I think I am hanging out with Brit... Yeah thats it....

Monday: Going to school.... Boring.... Hanging out with Brit...

Tuesday: LAST FUCKING DAY OF SCHOOL.... Brit is spending the night and I dnt know we might party....

Wensday: Going to worlds of fun for a whole day with..... Me, Brit, Jason, Jacob, My mom, Mark, Jason's friend Josh (my sexy stud), Jenny, Bill, Morgan, Kyle (there a family and my mom's best friends), Then Jully, Donny, Hope, Buddy, and Faith (there a famile) but yeah ummm I am not going with any of those people me, brit, jason, and josh are all going to wake around..... You wannna know what I am going to do.... I am going to watch them ride roller costers because I hate roller costers....

Thursday: Dnt know yet

Friday: PARTY!!!

***** Ass Gradding *****

Ass grabbing day fridai
May 19th, 2006 is ass grabbin day. you will be able to grab whoevers ass you wanna grab. spread the word. you must Repost this before 10:00 tonight or else your crush will fall in love with your best friend. get ready to get yo ass grabbed!!!!!

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<3 Jessi

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Tue, 09 May 2006 19:34:29 GMT

Hey guys.... I havent been ar school for 2 days because I am in pain and it is making me sick.... I went tanning saturday for like 7 mins.... Well yeah I ent back sunday and I went for 20 mins I tought I was going for 10 mins and I got really burnt and its bad.... I mean its kind of purple.... But yeah it hurts.... But last night I woke up screaming in pain... so yeah I dnt know about tomorrow... I will see how it looks... But monday Brit stayed home with me because she was sick to so we just watched movies and slep... But then cory came over for alittle bit and then Brit went home... But yeah ummm.... Leave me lotz of comments.... Love ya guys....

<3 Jessica (Love you Brit)

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Would/will you?
[_] give me your number.
[_] come to my house to do nothing at but chill?
[_] fight me?
[_] do me?
[_] kiss me?
[_] let me kiss you?
[_] watch a movie with me?
[_] go out to dinner with me?
[_] let me drive you somewhere?
[_] take a shower with me?
[_] drink with me?
[_] take me home for the night?
[_] let me sleep in your bed?
[_] re-post this for me to answer your questions?
[_] Come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere?
[_] Lock me in your room and take advantage of me?
[_] let me make you breakfast?
[_] tickle me?
[_] let me tickle you?
[_] stick up for me if i was being put down?
[_] instant message me?
[_] greet me in public?
[_] hang out with me?
[_] bring me around your friends?
[_] be down with me no matter what?
[_] go to prom with me?

D0 Y0U...
[_] think im cute?
[_] think im serious?
[_] think im a good person
[_] think im conceided?
[_] want to kiss me?
[_] want to cuddle with me?
[_] want to hook up with me?
[_] think I can fight?
[_] want to *Do* me?
[_] think I would do you?

AM I...
[_] smart?
[_] cute?
[_] funny?
[_] cool?
[_] romantic?
[_] a *freak*?
[_] gangsta?
[_] loveable?
[_] adorable?
[_] trustworthy
[_] compassionate?
[_] great to be with?
[_] attractive?
[_] mean?
[_] well known?

HAVE Y0U EVER...
[_] thought about hooking up with me?
[_]found yourself wanting a kiss from me?
[_] wished I were there?
[_] had a crush on me?
[_] wanted my number?
[_] had a dream about me?
[_] been distracted by me?
[_] wanted to see my private part?
[_] looked at my page more than ten times?

ARE Y0U...
[_] happy you know me?
[_] horny?
[_] thinking about me?
[_] wanting to call me to talk about these things?
[_] going to repost this?

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Thu, 04 May 2006 20:45:25 GMT

Hey everyone.... Yeah I havent update in like forever.... Yeah but I am at my BEST FRIENDS house..... *Brit*.... I love that gurl... But yeah this is my week.... K...

Monday: Ummm Went to Brits house and she started to get sick.... But we had fun...

Tuesday: Went to school but then I kind of didnt feel good so I went home and Brit didnt go to school because she was sick so we like talked all day.... Yeah it was fun.... I mean even if we didnt feel good....

Wensday: Ummmm.... Brit came to my house.... I got in a fight with my mom and shit... Yeah but this was really bad... Yeah no one knows about this..... Well Brit does because she was there and Mykeal knows because I tell her everything.... But not as much as I tell Brit because Brit tells me everything.... But then I cooked dinner and then me and Brit walked to her house and then cory came over and Brits little bro reece gave cory a teabag.... Yeah it was funnny.... LOL... Then my mom came and picked me up and I did this thing to her back.......

Thursday: Brit came over to my house at 5:15 in the morning to go to school with me.... Yeah it was crazy and then cory picked us up and we got stoped by the stupid teachers.... Yeah and then we watched that stupid play at school.... Me and Brit were like laughing so hard.... But she was makeing me laugh.... Yeah but here I am at her house.... But I dnt think we are really doing anything tonight..

Friday: Umm Brit got grounded so I couldnt hang out with her.... I went out to dinner with my dad, his friends Chris and Tawyna.... Ummm then hanged out and went home.... I had so much fun....

Saturday: Ummm went to wal*mart and out to eat with my dad and Jacob.... Then went tanning... Oh and got a new lip ring...

Sunday: Went tanning and thats really it... Well I got burnt...

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All the while I'm feeling like I'm standing in the middle of a crowded room, screaming at the top of my lungs, and no-one even looks up

Don`t tell me not to cry
Don`t pretend like it's not hard to say goodbye
Don`t walk away while I`m still crying
-Don`t act like the whole time you weren`t lying-

She stares at herself in the mirror
She doesn't notice how gorgeous she is
She doesn't give herself credit for being such a great person
A wonderful friend
A great listener
& she helps all her friends that need it
Even when it's a bad time for her
He doesn't see her beauty & now
neither does she.
</3

hope this story lets you know how you left me to
feel inside. & i hope this city screams when they read
what you've done to me. my biography is about
a boy who killed a girl; who thought that she was his
entire world. & when they find me on the bathroom
floor, i hope your world caves in, exactly like mine did.

you're a [loaded gun] & theres nowhere to run...
you cant SAVE ME N0W -- the damage is done xx

UGLY you'll never get a man
no one wants a FAT girl.
don't EAT that. BAD girl.
you're DAMAGED. not
SKINNY enough. FUCKED
in the head. no one WANTS
you. you THINK too much.
you're too INDENPENDENT.
you could be so much
BETTER if you were like her

And when the tears come
and the pain starts what do you do;
when you cant take the pain
and the blood dripping just doesnt help anymore.
What if SUICIDE is your anwser?

She's cut and bruised.
She feels so used.
The walls cave in.
When did this begin?
Her thoughts so deep.
It makes her weep.
She cuts and bleeds some more.
Crying all alone on the bathroom floor.
She needs someone to care.
Or at least tell her they're there.
Blood drips down.
But she doesn't make a sound.
All alone she breaks.
She's tired of everyone being so fake

i feel so worthless..
i feel like no one cares..
im standing here screaming,.
though no one seems to be aware..
trying not to break,.
im going to keep my smile fake..
my heart is dying on the inside..
but im stuck within myself..
wearing this outside disguise.

A broken mirror, a bleeding fist
A silver blade against a wrist
Tears falling down to lips unkissed
Ignore her and she won't exist
She's not the kind you'll come to miss

Pain, pain go away
let me smile for just one day
should that day i never see
let my blood run cold and free

Nothing is okay anymore she's falling apart and who knows how much longer she'll be around

it gets hard to trust anyone
when everyone you ever opened your heart to
has let you down

i'm the girl, the one that always lost. the one
with the fake smile && the girl who seems to
be so strong, but daily continues to break that
girl who's always there and seems to no problems
of her own. the one who holds, back tears until
she's off the phone.. that girl that is in love with
a guy who doesn't care .

You always look the prettiest when you smile.
Always remember that

She's too short
He's too tall
Her eyebrows are too thick
and his nose is too small
she acts too sad
he looks too weird
her freckles are too big
and no ones likes his beard
her mouth is filled with metal
he has four eyes instead of two
her hair is way too dark
and his eyes are way too blue
she paints her nails black
he always wears a tie
she'll never smile
and he'll never cry
she won't be noticed
he won't make the team
her name will never be in the lights
and he'll never achieve his dream
why must we all judge?
why is being accepted so tough?
why do people try so hard?
And why are the teenage years so rough?
No one should be judged
no one should feel excluded
and most of all, no one should be treated this way.

Here's to the crazy ones.
The misfits. The rebels. The trouble makers.
The round pegs in the square holes.
The ones who see things differently.
They aren't fond of rules.
You can quote them, dissagree with them,
the only thing you can't do is ignore them.
Because they change things.
While some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius.
Because the people who think they're crazy enough
to change the world, are the ones that do

it's like you get homesick .. for a
place that doesnt exist

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Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Wed, 26 Apr 2006 01:23:24 GMT

Friday: Nothing really.... Went to my house and watched my fav show... Then went to Brit's house and we ate Burger King and then we watched a movie and then got Dary Queen.... Ummm spent the night at here house....

Saturday: Ummm went to my house at like 2:50 and watched my fav show and then got ready and then went to Brits house and she is getting ready and then Cory and Chirs are coming over and then we are just going to hang.... Yeah and I dont know whats going on tonight so I will tell you guys....

Sunday: Going shopping maybe.... Hanging out withy Brit....

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i know i'm not easy to understand.
i know i keep a lot inside.
&& i know i'm not the easiest person to read.
but that's okay, you know.
because even though there's a lot about me you'll never know,
there's a hell a lot more of me you can learn to love.

it kills me to know your in the same room
but you wont even talk to me.

I couldn't make you see it, that I loved you
more than you'll ever know,
a part of me died when I let you go.

It's funny how appealing the curve of the noose
or the glint of the blade
or the top of the roof
or the bottle of pills
Looks when you're all alone
And suicide is looking
sweeter every day

When you get hopeless
you start to wonder a lot
you wonder why we're put on this earth
you question life
you question reality
I guess with all this wondering
you're just trying to figure out
so maybe you can understand
just why things suck so very much

Some druggies inject themselves so much
that their veins scab over and it hurts
too much to keep using the same places
So they just move on to another spot on their body
A similar thing happens for cutters
Our wrists can get so cut up and scarred
that it's really hard to find a place to cut them
So we just move on to another part of our body
Changing to please the blade

Fuck what i said it dont mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses, it didnt mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, i dont want you back
im nOt happy but i can [[.fake it.]]..
cant stand all this pain but sum how i'll [[ .take it. ]]

Cause when push comes to shove
you taste what you're made of.
You might bend till you break
cause it's all you can take.
On your knees, you look up,
decide you've had enough.
You get mad, you get strong
wipe your hands, shake it off.
Then you stand

sometimes I cry, I don't know why
cause this world is changing,
leaving me behind
but I cant complain,
this life I live
is more than I have to offer,
more than I have to give
but inside I'm screaming,
but they cant hear me now
If you can reach me,
I need you now more than I ever did
And so I sit, and stare at the sky
and if you're here,
please tell me why
this oceans big, so far and wide
and everyday
I watch the sun fade from my eyes
And now I'm praying,
so if you can hear me
help me out, shed some light on my life
cause I need it now more than I ever did
if you saw me now,
you'd say don't cry
baby girl wipe those tears from your eyes
cause now your doing,
everything they said you couldn't do
and now you realize
you don't need them as much
as you thought you did
and now they're screaming,
and you can hear them loud and clear
and now they need you,
just like you needed them

i hate that feeling where, you're walking with someone down a dark path..& its a HARD path..you have to walk around holes, but you're holding their hand so its all okay.. & you'll keep going no matter how hard it gets. & then all of a sudden you look over & they're not there anymore. You're all alone. & you look around waiting for someone to grab your hand to lead you out safely & you're bleeding & bruised & crying. & you have to do it alone knowing that the person you had..is holding someone else's hand now

its weird walking past those
people that used to be your
best friends, feeling like
you hardly even know them

I remind myself not to cry.
Smile and hold my head up high.
Broken by all that never really mattered.
Bit my tongue every day.
Because there are words still left to say.
So I'll whipe each tear from my eye....
And remember... I'm not supposed to cry

i'll be fine;
i just need sometime
i'm hanging on today
and nothings gonna stop
me anyway im holding on
im strong <33

i know i don't have the prettiest face for you to look at or the skinniest waist for you to put your arm around, but i do have the biggest heart to always love you with

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I am telling everyone what I am doing this weekend.... Brit told me I sould.... I love that gurl.... But yeah ummm this week has been the shit.... Yesterday I went to Brits house and I put highlights in her hair and we were sitting there and she tuched the top of her head and it was hot and so we started freaking out and then I riped the cap off her head and it hurt her... But yeah it looks good.... But yeah and tonight was OH MY GOD.... Thats all I have to say... But yeah me and Brit were cooking dinner and then Ginger calls and says she is coming over and she get there and doesnt say 2 words to Brit and then she got mad at Brit because I geuss Brit said that she couldnt eat.... Yeah OK.... But yeah then Cory went over and we watched movies then I had to leave.... But I kind of was getting a little jelouse..... LOL... But yeah ummmm this weekend..... Friday I am hanging out with my gurl Brit and we are going out to eat for her birthday.... yeah and then saturday I dont really know.... Sunday nothing really..... But yeah how do you tell someone that you are REALLY SRY but they wont lisen... Yeah well.... Leave me lotz of comments.... LOL.....

<3 Jessica

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